And the drama begins once again with that same damn boy...
Okay, let me say this: I know that I am probably setting myself up to get hurt again. I've accepted that. But somewhere between almost getting arrested at a party and passing out on the floor, he looked at me and told me that he still thinks about me a lot, and I couldn't help but say the same thing right back to him. And pretty soon we were talking out everything that went wrong back then, and he said that he wanted to make it up to me, and I think I might have actually oh my god used the L word. We kissed and when I fell asleep he picked me up and put me on the couch and covered me with a blanket and slept on the floor next to me.
The next morning, completely sober, I expected him to pretend it hadn't happened; I was wrong. He apologized again and all day he found ways to remind me of the fact that we are on very good terms once again. It was all too easy to fall right back into that same habit of being crazy about him.
The problem? He still has that girlfriend...
I don't know how to deal with this situation. I know they've had problems in the past, but they're pretty serious - I highly doubt he'll break up with her. But he also sounded pretty serious with me Saturday night.
So for now we'll keep talking on a regular basis and catching up on each other's lives, and I'll keep wondering if anything is ever going to come of it, if he's ever going to follow through with that promise to make up for all the things that he did. I did a lot of things wrong back then too, and I'd like the chance to make it up to him.
I guess I'll just have to be patient. For now, I think I can be.
nicole: 19-year-old LSU sophomore. biochemistry, pre-med. native new orleanian. starbucks barista. borderline alcoholic. addicted to facebook, red bull and vodka, and college football. a little neurotic, extremely indecisive, and often irresponsible.
